Redefining Parenthood; From the Moment of Diagnosis, Life Changes

Parenting comes with many dreams and expectations of what your family will be.  When you’re a mom whose child is diagnosed with autism, the road is one you never planned to travel. It will require strength you didn’t know you had, patience that stretches you to your limits, and you will find happiness in the most unexpected moments.

From the moment of diagnosis, life changes—not just for your child but for your entire family. It’s like stepping into a new world where everything feels uncertain. There’s the grief of what you thought would be, mixed with the determination to understand and support the amazing child you’ve been given.

As moms, we’ve all felt it. The stares in public when your child’s behavior doesn’t align with what others expect. The whispered comments that linger like an unwelcome shadow. The endless worry about their future and whether the world will ever fully embrace their uniqueness.

It’s exhausting, and let’s be honest—it can feel isolating.

But there’s another side to this parenting path I want to share. It’s when the “YET” you’ve waited so long for becomes reality.  Simple things, like wearing pants or tolerating a haircut without a full-blown meltdown.  It’s that belly laugh at something uniquely funny to them. It’s the perspective they bring to the world, reminding you to slow down, look closer, and appreciate life in ways you never thought possible.

When you allow yourself to shift your perspective, you change too. You begin to see the world through their eyes—you learn to slow down and appreciate the simple things in life. This perspective brings a new kind of gratitude for what truly matters, and a resilience you never thought possible. By embracing their way of seeing the world, we grow into moms who are better, stronger, and a more resilient version of ourselves.

At Not Your Average Autism Mom, we are changing the narrative of what it means to raise autistic children. It’s not about focusing on the challenges alone; it’s about embracing the life we have. We stop resisting it.  We stop wishing it were different and instead, we embrace it for exactly what it is even on the most difficult days.

I dream of a world where inclusion and acceptance isn’t something we have to fight for—where people don’t just tolerate differences but embrace them. A world where our children and adults aren’t judged or excluded but are welcomed for exactly who they are.

That world starts with us. It starts with moms like you and me, advocating, educating, and sharing our stories. We are the voices that will shift the narrative. Every time we show up for our kids, every time we educate someone about autism, and every time we celebrate our child’s unique way of being, we are creating change.

This parenting journey is not easy. There are days when it feels overwhelming and lonely. But you’re not alone, Mama. Together, we can rewrite what the world sees when they look at autism. Together, we can make inclusion and acceptance normal instead of the exception.

So let’s hold onto HOPE. Let’s cling to the moments that remind us why this journey matters so much. And remember, above all else, you are making a difference for the families who will come behind you on this parenting journey they won’t be prepared for. 💙

This was written by Shannon Urquiola at Not Your Average Autism Mom.

Thank you for being part of our journey.